Green And Shiny Yellow

I forever feel wanderlust. I have a home in three countries, with many people and in many places yet to discover. There's the country where I was born and raised, the country where I escaped to, where I was free for the first time, where I was silly and young and happy and sad, and the country I always dreamed about, where I live now. In my heart I am homeless, I've never settled anywhere. I always think about the next step, how to pack my bags and continue my search for a place where I feel I want to stay. I am always missing the places I am not in and the people I am not with. Sometimes to the extent that it feels like I forget where I actually am and who I am with. I forget to appreciate and I forget to be thankful.

I am stingy when it comes to building nests, careers, relationships. I never get too comfortable in a room, in a role or with a person. I wouldn't paint walls or buy something heavy because it would make it more difficult to leave. I wouldn't take a position of responsibility in a company or commit to a long lasting education, make a CreaTea shaped hole in some material. I wouldn't open my heart and head and past and future to a person because it could turn into an anchor. 

In the end I carry my home with me like a snail. I am me, my own person. I think I am getting there, I am finding a place to stay. I've seen a corner, a chimney, a smile. I even bought a rough chest of drawers, painted it and changed the knobs! X